The Maury Show

Something just doesn’t feel right.

My Cousin Sauresha asked my opinion about her boyfriend inviting her and his handsome male business partner to go on the Maury Show. Sauresha said that her boyfriend wanted to tell her something and thought it would be most appropriate to do it on the Maury Show.

I asked Sauresha if her boyfriend had been acting different lately. She said the only thing out of the norm has been his complaining that his butt hurts. She said she had been rubbin lotion on the area around his sphincter muscles the last couple months. Her boyfriend said that he had accidentally sat on the shifter in his jaguar.

I said this makes me a little nervous because I have a stick shift and I’ve never sat on the shifter.

Also I watched the Maury Show for the first time on Memorial Day and I didn’t like seeing those big ladies in the audience yelling at the guests. I can see my cousin Sauresha running into the audience and taking care of business.

In the end I told Sauresha to go on the Maury Show because most likely her boyfriend had slept with his business partner’s wife. I told Sauresha that men are always looking for sex, whether it’s with the business partner’s wife or a woodpecker hole in a tree. Don’t let a little innocent sex damage an otherwise strong relationship.

I’m thinking about changing my name from Mr. Gator to Dr. Phil Gator.